I have had several people ask me about the specifics of our adoption process -- what was the paperwork like, how invasive was it, does it take a long time to get it all done, etc. So this blog is going to attempt to answer some of these. I can only answer, however, based on the experience we have had in two states working with one agency doing a domestic adoption. If you are interested in adopting internationally, your process could look similar or it could look different. Most likely, there would be more paperwork and time involved. Here is what we were required to do for our adoption:
1. Copies of birth certificates, marriage license, infant CPR and First Aid cards.
2. Fingerprints and Child Abuse and Neglect forms (you send these in to get background checks done)
3. Statement of Faith
4. Marriage history questions
5. Family history questions
6. Financial worksheet (spelling out your debts, assets, income, budget, etc.)
7. Medical reports (we all had to get a physical done, and drug tests)
8. References: 3 personal, 1 pastor's reference, and work references
9. Profile information: a sheet we filled out with basic info about ourselves that will be shown to prospective birth parents (questions included height, eye and hair color, hobbies, interests, jobs, etc.)
10. Openness in Adoption Covenant (how open are you willing to be -- contact with the birthparent(s), letters, pictures, etc.)
11. Insurance information (proof of homeowners/renter's insurance and car insurance, as well as life insurance)
12. Photo Album (we used Shutterfly)
13. "Dear Expectant Mother/Father" letters -- letters to the birthparents telling more about us. The letters and photo album would be shown to prospective birthparents as they are choosing an adoptive family.
I think these are the main forms we had to fill out. The time-consuming part is getting all of the background checks back (sometimes there can be a back-up in the state system, so it can take awhile), and getting all of our medical exams scheduled. There can be a lot of questions on the profile stuff, so you have to carve out some time to fill it out, but it's usually not too bad. In addition to the paperwork, most agencies require some kind of training classes. In Virginia, we had to go to three different 3-hour classes that were held in the evenings. In Washington, there is a 1-day 8-hour class that you can do, as well as online classes, movies, books, etc. that you show documentation of having studied up on adoption.
I hope this helps answer some questions. I would love for people to ask questions if they have them -- it helps me come up with ideas for blogs.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Fun Facts
As I envision Malachi growing up and going to school, I have this vision in my mind of that kid that keeps ending up in the principal's office, but every teacher loves him and is secretly laughing while they write him up. And if any other teachers are suckers for dimples like I was, it's going to be hard not to give in to that grin. Malachi has to be one of the funniest kids I know. He is rarely upset (though starting to get a temper when he doesn't get his way) and never afraid to try something, which leads to some hilarious situations. So here are some of the things about Malachi that make me happy:
1) Malachi loves to be chased, and he crawls off as fast as he can around the corner and then stops and waits for me to get there. As I round the corner he starts giggling uncontrollably and falls straight backward (usually hitting his head). It's the funniest reaction I've ever seen, and he does it over and over again. Hopefully it won't cause brain damage.
2) Malachi gargles his water. He takes sip after sip from his cup and then throws his head back and gargles. Hilarious.
3) He likes to take his blankie (his favorite blankie that he simply can't live without) and when he's supposed to be napping or going to bed at night, he stands at the edge of his crib and drops the blankie on the floor. He then peers over the crib laughing and squealing, followed by loud cries because he realizes he has lost his blankie. This is both funny and annoying.
4) Malachi loves to crawl as fast as he can to one side of his crib, stand up, and fall backwards, bouncing off the mattress. Then he laughs hysterically, crawls to the other side and repeats. This can go on for 5-10 minutes. The kid has way too much fun.
5) Malachi is a picky eater. He absolutely refuses to eat some textures (mainly anything that I cook) and will spit it out and then pull the food (soup included) off his tongue. It then usually ends up in his hair (thus, the reason he had a haircut).
6) Malachi loves grilled cheese. This is a very good thing (as anyone who knows me can attest), as I eat grilled cheese nearly every day. Now I simply share my grilled cheese with Malachi, meaning I get the crust and he gets the rest.
7) Malachi loves to lie on his back on the floor and squeal in a high-pitched girly voice while kicking his legs and swinging his arms back and forth. Can we say hyper?
8) Malachi has learned to wave, but prefers to wave not at people, but at lampposts. Every day as we walk to the car, he begins to wave at all of the lampposts we pass. Waving at people, however, has not occurred to him.
9) Malachi will probably play the cymbals when he grows up. If he has two different objects in his hands, no matter what they are, he will bang them together smiling happily. Today it was a spoon and a cup, two metal mixing bowls (talk about loud), and a baby's two feet at Bible study.
10) Malachi gets into all kinds of trouble when I'm trying to get ready in the morning. This includes: Tearing pieces of paper into tiny shreds. Smashing his fingers in the toilet bowl, which he also tried to lick. Eating my and Aaron's shoes. Trying to read "Les Miserables." Turning my heated mattress cover on and off, and then trying to eat the cords. Throwing anything he can find into the bathtub, and then nearly falling in trying to get them back. Etc.
There are so many other things Malachi does that make me laugh or bring a smile to my face. It's hard to believe he will be 1 in less than 3 weeks. Wow. I never knew a child could make me smile this much (and I also never imagined myself saying things like, "Please don't lick the toilet bowl. That's yucky.") Being a parent has its trials, but we wouldn't trade it for the world. Malachi, we love you. Thanks for bringing us so much joy.
1) Malachi loves to be chased, and he crawls off as fast as he can around the corner and then stops and waits for me to get there. As I round the corner he starts giggling uncontrollably and falls straight backward (usually hitting his head). It's the funniest reaction I've ever seen, and he does it over and over again. Hopefully it won't cause brain damage.
2) Malachi gargles his water. He takes sip after sip from his cup and then throws his head back and gargles. Hilarious.
3) He likes to take his blankie (his favorite blankie that he simply can't live without) and when he's supposed to be napping or going to bed at night, he stands at the edge of his crib and drops the blankie on the floor. He then peers over the crib laughing and squealing, followed by loud cries because he realizes he has lost his blankie. This is both funny and annoying.
4) Malachi loves to crawl as fast as he can to one side of his crib, stand up, and fall backwards, bouncing off the mattress. Then he laughs hysterically, crawls to the other side and repeats. This can go on for 5-10 minutes. The kid has way too much fun.
5) Malachi is a picky eater. He absolutely refuses to eat some textures (mainly anything that I cook) and will spit it out and then pull the food (soup included) off his tongue. It then usually ends up in his hair (thus, the reason he had a haircut).
6) Malachi loves grilled cheese. This is a very good thing (as anyone who knows me can attest), as I eat grilled cheese nearly every day. Now I simply share my grilled cheese with Malachi, meaning I get the crust and he gets the rest.
7) Malachi loves to lie on his back on the floor and squeal in a high-pitched girly voice while kicking his legs and swinging his arms back and forth. Can we say hyper?
8) Malachi has learned to wave, but prefers to wave not at people, but at lampposts. Every day as we walk to the car, he begins to wave at all of the lampposts we pass. Waving at people, however, has not occurred to him.
9) Malachi will probably play the cymbals when he grows up. If he has two different objects in his hands, no matter what they are, he will bang them together smiling happily. Today it was a spoon and a cup, two metal mixing bowls (talk about loud), and a baby's two feet at Bible study.
10) Malachi gets into all kinds of trouble when I'm trying to get ready in the morning. This includes: Tearing pieces of paper into tiny shreds. Smashing his fingers in the toilet bowl, which he also tried to lick. Eating my and Aaron's shoes. Trying to read "Les Miserables." Turning my heated mattress cover on and off, and then trying to eat the cords. Throwing anything he can find into the bathtub, and then nearly falling in trying to get them back. Etc.
There are so many other things Malachi does that make me laugh or bring a smile to my face. It's hard to believe he will be 1 in less than 3 weeks. Wow. I never knew a child could make me smile this much (and I also never imagined myself saying things like, "Please don't lick the toilet bowl. That's yucky.") Being a parent has its trials, but we wouldn't trade it for the world. Malachi, we love you. Thanks for bringing us so much joy.
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